Yanli Xie (谢延丽)

This nanny cared for my child from when the baby was 3 months old until 11 months old. The first three months were barely acceptable. After that, things became increasingly outrageous, and she became passive and negligent at work. Here are some of the things we experienced: 1. She was extremely unskilled at making baby food, and the food she made was hard to describe. If she did not know how, she could have learned—there are so many tutorials online. Not only did she not learn, she was also very lazy and fed the child premade baby-food pouches. At most, she would steam an egg. A 10-month-old needs food with some texture, yet she had no knowledge of this at all—or perhaps she was simply too lazy to make it. 2. When the child slept, she slept too, for both the morning and afternoon naps. Every morning and evening, she would stay in the bathroom for an hour. This was when the child was awake, so we could only watch the child ourselves. What exactly did I hire you for? When asked to adjust, she became very unhappy, with such a long face that it was awkward to look at. 3. She had absolutely no safety awareness. The child chewing on unwashed fruit was not even the most serious issue. When we got home, we found a fly swatter, electrical cords, and other dangerous items for a child all left on the floor. You can imagine how long the child had been crawling on the floor and how many things the child had put in their mouth. She liked taking the child out into the yard, where she would lay down a mat and lie on it herself while letting the child crawl freely on the grass. Only when she saw us come outside would she pull the child back onto the mat. Several times, we found the child eating grass or licking tree bark. Once, we even saw the child eating morning glory flowers. We stopped it immediately. It made no difference at all to her; she did not think it was a big deal. Morning glory is poisonous. 4. She could not make baby food and would not make baby food. If the employer made it, couldn’t she at least feed it properly? We stepped out for three minutes, and she poured the baby food out for the family dog to eat. I was furious when I saw it on the security camera. 5. She let the child watch a phone, even in the dark at night. When she watched it, the child watched it too. She had no conscience—such a young child’s eyesight could be ruined. 6. She never held the child upright. She would just lift the child by gripping around the stomach area. Was she afraid of getting hurt herself? The child became especially clingy with us and clearly did not receive good interaction or care. 7. This nanny paid a great deal of attention to personal care. We had a bottle-washing machine at home, and dishes were washed in the dishwasher. The only thing that needed to be hand-washed was the bib used for baby food. Yet she needed to protect her hands, applying Vaseline and wearing gloves at night. How exactly are you supposed to care for a child while wearing gloves? Did I hire you to focus on wellness? 8. She manipulated the employers. Knowing that we were busy and had to go out, she would become negligent in every possible way. In response to all these problems, we used AI to set up a daily schedule, the nanny’s duties, and meal plans. She would not even look at them; they were left on the table outside the whole time. She continued doing whatever she wanted. 9. There were plenty of vegetables in the refrigerator that she could eat, and we never placed any restrictions on her. When we had to go out, she insisted on leaving the child alone inside the house to cut sweet potato leaves from the yard. It is fine if you like fresh vegetables; there were some in the refrigerator, and when we were home you could also go cut some to eat. But you cannot let the child out of your sight or leave the child alone in the house. It is very dangerous! After we let her go, we listed this issue, and she replied sarcastically: “I committed an unforgivable crime by eating your precious sweet potato leaves.” She was avoiding the real issue. Was a little bit of vegetables the point? 10. When we went out, she cooked noodles and did not even wash the noodle pot. When asked, she said she had no time to wash it because she was caring for the child. But you were letting the child crawl on the floor, so what exactly were you doing? 11. During the interview, she said she could also do simple housework; people should be considerate of each other. She took advantage of our kindness. After she came, not only did she not do housework, she did not even complete her own core responsibilities. 12. She criticized her previous employer in the Bay Area for being stingy and not giving her enough to eat. At my home, it would have been no problem for one person to eat as much as the three of us combined. She could eat whatever she wanted, as long as she took good care of the child. But no matter how much she ate, it was useless. There were several times when we wanted to let her go, but we were very busy. We are a dual-income family, we also have an older child, and we were afraid that frequently changing caregivers would be bad for the baby. So we kept struggling and tolerating it, and she became worse and worse. I especially regret it and feel sorry for my child for making the child suffer for so long. People full of petty cleverness will one day suffer the consequences of their own little schemes and tricks.