Making Caregiving
More Transparent

"Thank you, Auntie, for taking such good care of our whole family and our dog during this time! Auntie was especially conscientious and responsible with our baby. Every day, she carefully cared for the baby: washing the baby’s face and neck, doing gas-relief exercises, soothing massage, tummy time, showing black-and-white cards, changing diapers, bathing, and a whole range of daily care. She even gave the baby a little anti-dandruff spa, haha. Before finishing work each day, she was also very patient about making sure my husband and I had learned how to care for the baby. We could feel that she truly loved our baby and sincerely wanted the baby to be comfortable and healthy. Auntie can make so many substantial dishes (you absolutely have to try her pork hock and ribs!!), making it impossible for us to stick to the fitness meals we had planned to eat = = It happened to be my husband’s birthday, and Auntie specially made a whole table of delicious food. It made us feel like we were celebrating the New Year! Auntie also got along especially well with our dog. We have an Australian Shepherd who needs to be played with every day. After the baby arrived, we really could not give the dog enough attention, so Auntie voluntarily helped walk him and play with him. Later, our dog was always looking for Auntie. Auntie also took great care of our family’s emotions, especially the new mom’s. Many times, just a sentence or a little joke from her could help all of us relax. She was not only caring for the baby, but also caring for the emotional well-being of the whole family. She was a great help in keeping things relaxed and harmonious between my husband and me. There was no sense of distance when being around Auntie, and she never made people feel there was excessive formality or scorekeeping. She came across as very dependable and genuine. Trust built up day by day. Later, my husband and I often went out together to take care of things. With only Auntie, the baby, and the dog at home, we were never worried at all. We are truly very grateful for Auntie’s hard work during this time. For us, what she brought was not merely professional postpartum nanny service; she truly helped us care for this home, put her heart into it, and accompanied us through a very special period in our lives."

"We have been very happy with Luo aiyi and would highly recommend her to any family. She is wonderful with our babies —caring, attentive, patient, and dependable. We feel confident leaving our babies in her care if we need to step away for whatever reason. She is also an excellent cook and has been a tremendous help with preparing delicious, healthy meals for our family. She is thoughtful about our preferences and is very efficient in producing meals in a timely manner. Just as importantly, she communicates well with us as parents and is respectful of our routines, preferences, and parenting style. She is easy to work with, trustworthy, and genuinely invested in making sure our family is happy and comfortable. We are very grateful for all that she has done for us and would gladly recommend her to other families."

"She talked herself up, claiming she was very good with children and an excellent cook, and that she only took long-term jobs. I thought she must be very capable, but the reality was extremely disappointing. She failed at every one of the three most basic aspects of childcare: 1. Feeding: Even after I taught her the “tips and tricks,” every morning one-third to one-half of the milk was still left, and my husband or I had to finish feeding it. She put a nipple on the milk-storage bottle to feed the baby, making it impossible to release air; even after being taught at least three times, she still could not figure out how many bags of breast milk needed to be thawed each day or how to thaw them. 2. Solid food: She gave me the impression that she had never made it before. She asked me what to make for every meal. After discovering that my daughter liked tomatoes and shrimp, she made that same dish for every meal. One morning, almost 9:00, I asked what my daughter had eaten for breakfast, and she said leftover food from the night before! (Yet her requirement for us was that she needed eggs, milk, and bread in the morning to ensure nutrition and calcium intake.) 3. Settling her for daytime naps: She could not soothe my daughter. My daughter is an angel baby who never cries when sleeping, but this nanny kept making her cry so hard she squealed like a pig, leaving me unable to work peacefully during the day. Also, I was looking for a live-in nanny who could balance childcare and simple household chores and manage her time reasonably. But once she held the child, she could not do anything else, claiming that her childcare philosophy was to ensure the child’s safety. Did I hire a mother-in-law instead? :) Other small things included not knowing how to use the dryer and leaving undried clothes piled in a basket, so after working late I discovered I still had to hang them up myself in the middle of the night; not closing the door behind her when she came into my room while I was sleeping to take my daughter out; when we were out all day and told her to help wash clothes and organize the rooms, we came home to find the play area still a mess and clothes still in the dryer the next day; after I tidied the sofa and folded my daughter’s clothes in the middle of the night, I woke up the next morning to find the sofa cluttered again with things tossed all over it; and so on. If all of those are small matters, the most intolerable part was that, despite her limited ability, she was inexplicably self-confident and argued with me forcefully. Whenever I expressed dissatisfaction, she had all kinds of excuses and rebuttals, raising her voice and going on and on. I have only one thing to say: parenting philosophy and ability are two different things; there is no need to argue. After one week, my husband and I decided to replace her. We even gave her a week to find another job to save her face, but she taught me a lesson instead: thank you, please immediately pack your things and leave. When she left, she said sorry, that she was a bit stubborn. Being stubborn means she is not suited to this line of work. Moms in the group, keep your eyes open. Many problems cannot be discovered in an interview. If you find that a nanny lacks ability and professionalism, replace her immediately and decisively. Do not put up with it and pay money only to make yourself upset."