We originally only wanted to sign for 30 days. She said her schedule was hard to arrange and insisted on 40 days, so we agreed. As a result, not long after the second wage settlement, she suddenly said she wanted to leave early and had already arranged her next job. The money was collected in installments, the contract was also signed, and only after collecting the money did she say she wanted to leave. The $2,000 deposit had to wait until the last 13 days before it could be applied, so throughout the whole service period that $2,000 was in her hands; if something went wrong, you had to think it over first. The contract also forcibly included a 10% tip—not a suggestion, but mandatory—and the whole contract protected only her interests.
Attitude
She habitually spoke in a commanding tone, was forceful, and always thought she was right. We hired a postpartum nanny hoping someone would help me get through the hardest period, but instead I had to deal with this way of interacting every day.
Flashlight
At night, when I checked the monitor, she was holding the baby while using her phone. Whenever a message came in, the flash kept flashing nonstop in the dark baby room. It was not something I mentioned only once; every time I brought it up, she made excuses. The last time it directly turned into an argument, while the baby was sleeping right next to us. It only stopped after I first said I did not want to continue. There was no apology and no change. That night we decided to let her go.
Phone never left her hand
She used her phone while taking care of the child. The flashlight incident only brought this issue into the open; in fact, it ran through the entire service period.
Disrespect for privacy
She would directly push the door open and come in whether there was something going on or not, without saying anything first. Even in the morning when we were still sleeping, the door was opened directly and she came in. After being reminded, she said she had not done it and talked back on the spot.
Did not take care of things in the home
She broke two faucets by using too much force—one was bent and one leaked and could not be shut off. In the end, we had to hire someone to replace them to solve the problem. She used a lot of force in everything she did; closing doors and drawers made banging noises. During postpartum confinement my sleep was already light, and telling her did not help.
Kitchen hygiene
She never wiped the sink dry after using it. After she left, we found that the grout had already become moldy and black. The refrigerator handle was greasy, there were often oil stains on the table, and many details did not hold up to scrutiny. Because I did not want to get up early, I proactively said she did not need to make breakfast and that two meals were enough, thinking she could spend more time on the baby. In the end, the things she was going to slack off on were still the same.
Professional negligence
After my C-section, I kept using my hands to support myself when getting up. Now my tenosynovitis is very serious; it hurts even to hold the baby, and I need steroid injections. During the whole service period, she never reminded me that after a C-section I needed to be careful about how I got up. This is the most basic thing a postpartum nanny should tell someone.
Missing item
The egg beater she told us to buy—when she used it, she even asked how much it cost and said she wanted one. After she left, it was simply gone. It was only something worth a few dozen dollars, but this kind of behavior made me very uncomfortable.
The day she left
We bought her plane ticket, reimbursed her car fare, and paid an extra half-day of wages, hoping to part on good terms. She was not willing and wanted a full day. She said sarcastically, “That little bit of money won’t make you rich if you take it, and I won’t become poor without it,” and was ready to start cursing. After arriving at the airport, she messaged again saying the $45 baggage fee had not been reimbursed, and continued messaging the next day. Speechless.
After the new auntie arrived and checked the baby supplies, she found that the bottom of the bottle sterilizer was full of limescale, black and dirty, and had never been cleaned. The baby’s bottles were sterilized in it every day, and I had had no idea before.
After Sun Meiyun left my home, she discussed my private matters at her new employer’s home and, without any factual basis, spread false information about my profession to the employer and a postpartum nanny group, making up rumors and malicious guesses about my work and identity.
While she was at my home, she also mentioned negative things about her previous employer many times, complained that the employer “threatened her,” and attributed things such as my slow postpartum reactions to issues with that employer, while frequently making negative comments about the previous employer. Looking back now, someone who constantly creates negative evaluations between different employers should actually have been let go in time even then.
While she was at my home, when I, as the mother, went to see the baby, learn about the baby’s condition, or raise reasonable opinions, she said I was “too much trouble” and “like a supervisor.” It was as if an employer could not care about her own child and could not give opinions about the care work.
In addition, she often recommended expensive silk quilts, bird’s nest, and postpartum recovery programs to the postpartum mother. I later learned from a postpartum recovery staff member that for every successful referral she made for postpartum recovery, she could receive a $500 referral fee. This also made me question her true motives in recommending these programs.
She also has long used Douyin livestreams to recruit aunties to come to the United States and recommend related personnel and services to mothers.
A person’s professional ability can improve, but character and professional ethics are the bottom line. Talking about employers behind their backs, disparaging different employers to each other, spreading private information, being unable to accept reasonable supervision, and treating clients as targets for sales and profit all showed me very clear problems with boundaries and professional conduct.
Even more ironic is that, as I understand it, her current employer is also dissatisfied with her service and has already dismissed her early.